When it comes to facing imminent victimization, most of us…we just want the bad man to go away.

We avoid conflict. We abhor violence. There is a natural disinclination to react, not to mention attack.  Understandable, but dangerous.

When we are in the crosshairs of violence, we either break the freeze, suck it up and deliver the injury to the predator  — or we assume the old fetal tuck, maybe desperately flail a bit or even utter a few helpless pleadings. All to no avail.

Either way, if we survive, there will be post op psychic damage — real and permanent, not-good mental dings.  And nightmares.

If we survive and we were the ones doing the injury, research says our recovery is more likely and effective compared to passivity – meaning regret, guilt, paranoia — a hefty list.

When it comes to self defense, it is better to give than to receive.

Another key point: a significant chunk of class learning occurs… after class — the psych part  — when we roll the frightening, unimaginable fragments around in our brain.   And that is exactly how it is supposed to work: we are, in a very personal way, defining the do-not-cross line, exploring the no-tolerance boundary when we might flip the safety off our psyche for self preservation.

There must be some emotional desensitization, some “acceptance” of unthinkable violence so we can shut down the bad man  — when he just won’t go away.